Conversations with Teen People
by LadieLazarus
Summary: AU. Jack O'Neill has a conversation with his 16 year old daughter, Jordan.


Title: Conversations with Teen People

Title: Conversations with Teen People

Fandom: Stargate SG:1

Characters: Jack, OC

Pairings: Jack/Sam Implied, metioned

Summary: Jack has a conversation with his 16-year-old daughter.

Disclaimer: I don't own them. If I did, it would happen the way that I want it to.

Author's Note: I did, in fact, get permission to use Jordan O'Neill. She's from the story _Small Favors 2_ by Eve 8. I just really loved the Jordan character and this was a conversation that just stuck in my head, so I decided to use it. 

"So?" Jordan O'Neill sat across from her father in the booth of their favorite hamburger joint. She stirred her vanilla milkshake with the straw and took another sip before looking her father in the eye, causing him to flinch at the sudden scrutiny.

"So what, Jo?" Brigadier General Jack O'Neill was never going to get used to being totally disarmed by those giant, blue eyes. She shook her blonde curls out of her face and he had to remind himself, yet again, that she wasn't seven anymore.

"Dad," Jordan drew out the vowel the way that all teenage girls everywhere were apt to do and rolled her eyes. "You don't ever just bring me here for burgers in the middle of the day and let me get a milkshake unless you're going to tell me something that I don't want to hear." Jo smiled at the waitress as their food was put down in front of them. Two burgers, with every topping imaginable and two orders of steaming hot fries sat on the table and the waitress headed back in to the kitchen.

"That's not fair, Jordan. I just thought that it'd been a while since we'd talked and perhaps we should—"

"Mom told you about the college thing, huh?" Jordan cut him off, prepared not to let him continue with the pretence. Jack froze, feeling stupid at, yet again, being called out so easily by his ever-perceptive offspring.

Sam had, in fact, told him about the college thing. Jordan had started school two grades ahead, and so it was only natural that she ended up graduating from high school similarly early. Naturally, being the genius that she was, Jordan wanted to go to college. She and Sam had been discussing it, and Sam had finally told Jordan that any further decision would have to be put off until Jack had been let in on the decision-making process.

In truth, Jordan had been dreading this conversation since her mother had handed down that decree.

"Yeah, kiddo. Your mom told me last night. So, I figured maybe we better have a little sit-down and discuss this. And, since the odds of us getting up to the cabin for the next few—"

"Millennia." Jordan rolled her eyes again. Jack couldn't help but smile that his daughter seemed to yearn for a few days in near-deserted parts of Minnesota the same way that he did.

"I was going to say months, but that's a fair assessment, kid. It's just that I figured that this was not, in any way, a substitute, but it would give us a chance to talk."

"I'm glad. I want to talk about college, Dad. Mom and I have been looking at local colleges and Colorado College has a decent school in Boulder Springs with a semi-decent physics program. There are also a couple of other acceptable schools within driving distance. I wouldn't be living on campus, so I could still come home for dinner or whatever."

"That's all very interesting, and I've been reading that material myself, but I can't help but notice something that has me very concerned, Jordan."

"What's that, Dad?" Jordan had her "willing-to-negotiate" face on.

"Well, it seems that all of these schools have one thing in common. They all seem to have boys, Jordan." Jack took a bite of his cheeseburger-flavoured heart-attack, seeming all too pleased with himself.

"Actually, Dad, I've checked into it, and it turns out that that was a printing flaw. They're boyless, these schools. Every single one is absolutely without a single boy."

"You are lying to me, Jordan O'Neill."

"Yes, sir, I am." Jordan responded without skipping a beat and took a bite of burger looking completely unrepentant. Jack had to laugh.

"It was a nice try, but I've checked into it and these schools definitely have boys. I don't know how I feel about that. I mean, these aren't your garden-variety boys. These are college boys."

"Who are _so_ different from the boys on base." Jordan gave him that look that he would have sworn on a stack of bibles, if he had any, that Sam had pulled Jo aside and taught it to her personally.

"The boys on base are afraid of me. The boys at school aren't that smart yet. I just—I know!" Jack put down his coke a little too dramatically and Jordan jumped a little and yet managed to keep her face totally impassive. "We'll send you to Chulak! Bra'tac will teach you all kinds of fun stuff."

"Dad, the last time I checked, Chulak's physics program was a little behind in the times, and also, they have boys there, too."

"Yeah, but _those_ boys are afraid of Bra'tac and Teal'c, and I know I can count on _them_ to do for you as I would." Jack crossed his arms smugly.

Jordan stared at him until he looked away.

"Fine, fine," Jack muttered, "not Chulak…"

Jordan victoriously shoved three french-fries into her mouth at once and Jack took advantage of her inability to speak.

"Jonas! We'll send you to Collona or whatever the hell they're calling it these days! He'll hang out with you and teach you all of that advanced crap. And he's afraid of me so he'll keep you away from _those_ boys. "

Jordan choked briefly in her rush to swallow the fries, taking a sip of milkshake before she could continue.

"Dad. No. Absolutely not."

"Why not? You like Jonas."

"I _like_ Jonas. I do not wish to be stuck with Jonas for an extended period of time. Sure it will be fine for you, but where will I hide the mangled corpses?"

Jack choked back a laugh.

"Just hide them where you usually do, Jordan."

"That'll be awfully hard to do from another planet, _sir._ What do I do? Send 'em through the gate?"

"You know, Jo," Jack took the opportunity to eat a few of his fries before continuing. "You came up with that response a little faster then I would like. Makes me wonder what happened to that paper boy we had who liked you so much."

"He's in a better place. Besides, you'd rather he still hung around bugging me all of the time?" She smiled, and Jack suddenly realized that Jordan was definitely his child. Only someone related directly to him could look that evil while looking that relaxed simultaneously.

"I think we should change topics before I'm knowingly obstructing justice. So… more alternatives to college… I know! Have you thought about enlisting?"

Jordan had to laugh at the hopeful look on her father's face.

"Dad?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm sixteen, Dad. I can't enlist for another two years. I could be half-way done with my degree by then." Jordan finished her burger and picked at the few remaining fries with a respectable amount of enthusiasm. The girl was a bottomless pit.

Jack wracked his brain hoping that he would come up with a brilliant plan or even better that the Asgard would quickly beam him away and he could avoid the inevitable end to this conversation.

He momentarily considered Atlantis, but then remembered that he didn't trust Sheppard that much. Also, the idea of voluntarily placing Sam's daughter anywhere in the vicinity of Rodney made him realize that he was, once again, probably adding to the body count.

He knew that he had to accept that his daughter was growing up. And she was pretty much one of the smartest people he'd ever met, so her trip to college was inevitable. And, at least this way, she'd still be living at home, and he could keep an eye on her.

The way he saw it, he had two options here. Either he told Jordan that she could go to college and she was happy with him, or he told her no, and Sam forced him to eventually agree after weeks of uncomfortable sleeping on the couch. And frankly, at his age, the idea of sleeping on the couch for 30 minutes on a Sunday afternoon was unappealing enough to his back. The idea of doing it to win an argument that he knew he had no chance of winning was just stupid.

He sighed. This part of arguing with Sam or Jordan always sucked. This was the part where he lost and prayed to whatever deity might exist that he did it gracefully.

"Dad?" Jordan was looking at him expectantly as she finished the rest of her milkshake. "Look, I know that you hate this idea, but I can make you a couple of promises. I can promise to stick to whatever curfew you and Mom set, and to negotiate any extra-curricular activities with you guys beforehand. I can promise that my interest in college is completely academic. I want to be a physicist and they kind of expect you to have a college degree for that particular job. I just want you to understand that I'm not writing off your concerns. I just really need to go to college."

"Look, kiddo. I figure that I really can't argue with the logic behind that statement. Also, I don't want to deal with you and your mom if I tell you no considering that she's already threatened me with physical violence if I turn you down." Jack leaned back against the vinyl of the booth and dug into his pocket for his wallet.

"Wait. Are you serious?" Jordan looked positively radioactive with joy and Jack found himself really happy that he had agreed to this crazy proposition. He loved to see her happy like this. And even though this was going to be a pretty expensive way to grant her this kind of joy, it was going to be completely worth it in the long haul. Plus, hiding bodies on other planets had to be a fool-proof way of slipping out of a that-boy-touched-my-daughter-your-honor murder charge.

"Like a heart attack, kiddo. You want to go to Colorado College, you're on." Jack stood up to go pay the bill only to be tackled around the waist by fast-moving teenager. He fought to stay upright as she hugged him fiercely, and even as he struggled to maintain his center of gravity he realized that he had made the absolute right choice.

He sauntered up to the cash register feeling pretty much untouchable. He handed Jordan the tip and she walked back over to lay it on the table. He held the door open for her on the way out and as they walked to the pick-up truck, he slung an arm over her shoulder.

"Dad?"

"Yeah, kiddo?" He looked down at her.

"You do know I already have a boyfriend, right?"

Fin.


End file.
